‘Intentional Investment’: The Key To Staying Happy And Avoiding Divorce

When it comes to romantic relationships, no two are alike. However, there are some pretty universal truths that run through successful long-term relationships. For one thing, communication is key – whether things are going swimmingly or you’re at crisis point, communication (or a lack of it) can make or break a relationship.

Long-distance relationships are one thing, but turning that relationship into a marriage is a whole different kettle of fish. Exchanging those vows really turns the pressure up, and even couples that you would think were indestructible can end up adding to the divorce statistics.

Let’s look at those statistics for a moment – amazingly, the current evidence shows that the estimated percentage of marriages ending in divorce (assuming 2010 divorce and mortality rates throughout the duration of marriage) is around 42%. Around half of these divorces are expected to occur in the first 10 years of marriage.

I think it’s tragic that this many people can’t seem to make it work, and end up throwing in the towel. But what is the cause of this?

Well, a number of experts are not convinced that the number one cause of divorce is not anything that you might first think, such as adultery, financial problems, or irreconcilable differences. Those are most often symptoms of a deeper problem.

While these problems might be real, there is a much more fundamental issue at play most of the time. According to a marriage counsellor who wrote an article on the subject recently, they most common thing they see with couples who are struggling in marriage is a lack of intentional investment in their marriage.

Intentional investment might sound a bit left field, but it is a real thing, and a lack of it does have a real affect on marriages. Like anything else in life, a marriage requires an investment of our time, energy, effort and love. If we don’t have enough to invest, then it won’t pay back much, and you may eventually ‘go broke’.


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