“Zip your lips like a padlock”
Sometimes when cruising around in your car with the radio on, you’ll hear a song for the first time and hear a lyric that is SO bad that you are physically shook and think that your ears must be playing tricks on you. You know that it’s more likely for songs nowadays to be written by a whole group of people and to go through about a million checks and reworks before they’re let loose into the world- so you cannot believe that this lyric has actually been given the OK by a whole group of creative ‘artists’. You literally make this face;
It saddens us to say it and we sound like such a ‘Dad’- but music really is going downhill. We’ve gone from artists such as John Lennon writing profound, timeless lyrics with a message and an unnerving power behind them, to lyrics such as “do you ever feel like a plastic bag?”. Hmm, thanks for that, Katy Perry. We’re moved. (and no, we don’t).
Anyway, we’re not dissing all pop songs- we LOVE pop music. However, it doesn’t have the same feel and effect that it had a couple of decades ago. The only explanation we can give for this is that music artists are just churning out any old auto-tuned sh*t without much thought, message or talent at all. We know there’s some INCREDIBLE bands and artists out there- but we’re talking about the one’s who make the charts and are constantly played on radio- you know, the one’s with all the money and sadly all the fame.
Somehow, we can’t imagine “I’m trying to find the words to describe this girl / Without being disrespectful / Damn you’se a sexy bitch” being tattooed on someones arm in 30 years time.
Anyway, enough of the ranting- here’s the top 20 ridiculous song lyrics of all time. Enjoy!
1) Eminem- Love The Way You Lie
““Now you get to watch her leave out the window/ Guess that’s why they call it window pane”
2) 2 Chainz- Birthday Song
“She got a big booty so I call her Big Booty.”
3) Trey Songz- “LOL Smiley Face”
“Shorty just text me, says she want to sex me / LOL smiley face / LOL smiley face”
4) Katy Perry- Firework
“Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?”
5) Pitbull, “Give Me Everything”
“Me not working hard? / Yea, right! / Picture that with a Kodak / And, better yet, go to Times Square / Take a picture of me with a Kodak.”
6) Black Eyed Peas, “I Gotta Feeling”
“Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Saturday to Sunday.”
7) A Boogie Wit Da Hoodie- Drowing Water
“I’m the shit, I’m fartin’, I don’t know how to potty.”
8) Taylor Swift- Look What You Made Me Do
“I’m sorry, the old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now. Why? Oh, ‘cause she’s dead! (Oh)”
9) Lil B, “Wonton Soup”
“Bitches suck my dick because I look like J.K. Rowling.”
10) Ed Sheeran, “Wake Me Up”
“And I know you love Shrek / Because we’ve watched it 12 times.”
11) Rihanna ft Drake- What’s My Name?
“The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? / Cause I’ve been tryna work it out.”
12) David Guetta featuring Akon, “Sexy Bitch”
“I’m trying to find the words to describe this girl / Without being disrespectful / Damn you’se a sexy bitch.”
13) Kesha- Blah Blah Blah
“Zip your lips like a padlock”
14) Robin Thicke – Blurred Lines
“What rhymes with hug me?”
15) Hilary Duff, “So Yesterday”
“If the light is off, then it isn’t on.”
16) Jessie J – Wild
“Today I woke up, feelin’ like a mirror”
17) Nicki Minaj- Stupid Hoe
“You a stupid hoe, you a, you a stupid hoe/You a stupid hoe, you a, you a stupid hoe/You a stupid hoe, you a, you a stupid hoe”
18) Nicki Minaj (again)- Roman Holiday
“Quack quack to a duck and a chicken too / Put the hyena in a freakin’ zoo!”
19) Drake- Pop Style
“Got so many chains they call me Chaining Tatum”
20) Kanye West- Father Stretch My Hands
“Now if I f*ck this model/ And she just bleached her asshole/ And I get bleach on my t-shirt/ I’ma feel like an asshole”
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