Being a parent is a hard job, one of the hardest jobs in the world to be honest with you.
I don’t know how people manage it!
Being a parent is a full time job (often on top of another full time job). You have to constantly look after your children, if they wake up in the middle of the night, then your up too.
If they’re sick, you have to play nurse.
It’s an exhausting job but you have to do it. You get no breaks, and no pay.
Opinions on parenting styles are like butts, we all have one.
But that doesn’t give anyone (unless their an expert or your actually hurting your child) the right to tell you how to parent.
They’re allowed to disagree with how you raise your child, but they have no right in trying to stop you for it.
One of the latest topic of (heated) debate in the parenting scene is raising your child gender neutral.
There are some parents who are deciding to raise their child without gender, and some parents who are strongly against that idea.
As I said before, as long as your not hurting your kid, raise them how you wish.
But sadly there are some people out there who don’t share that opinion either.
Some people are arguing that you’re either a boy or girl, an idea which doesn’t go down too well in this day and age. Sadly, the world is not so black and white.
Meet the parents who are pushing the boundaries with their child.
Louise and Nikki Draven are Britian’s first genderfluid family, and they made the big decision to raise their child as neither a boy or a girl.
Four-year-old Star, who was born as a boy, is being raised gender neutral by his parents.
Star’s mom is Louise, who was actually born a man, but is currently transitioning to become a woman through hormone treatment.
Nikki, is Star’s dad, was actually he was actually born as a woman but dresses in either a “masculine” or “feminine” way depending on which day of the week it is.
To put things in a rather simple way, Mom Louise is actually Star’s biological father, while dad Nikki, is actually the birth mother.
“Neither of us gets hung up on the gender we were born as.
“We don’t want our child constrained by that either. We’re just an ordinary family being who we want to be.”
Star is set to begin school in September and will wear a boy’s uniform, but he will also wear a pink vest and socks which he has already picked.
The child says that he will grow up to be a boy or a girl eventually, and that it will be Star’s choice.
“We want to give him the confidence to be who he wants – growing up, we didn’t have that.
“We never tell Star he’s a boy, we tell him he can be whatever he wants. We don’t buy gender specific toys or clothes and we let him choose what he wears. Pink is one of his favourite colours.
“He loves wearing leggings and, because of his name, he loves clothes with star patterns on.
“He loves Barbie dolls, dressing up and fairies – but he also likes toys considered as boys’, such as cars.
“We use the words ‘he’ and ‘him’ but don’t make any kind of big deal out of him being one sex or the other.”
Because of their decision to raise Star gender fluid, and because of their own personal choices, the pair of received a fair share of abusive feedback from the public.
“It was worse when Star was small and Louise was first transitioning because people would point, stare and laugh.
“Sometimes they’d even follow us shouting insults. I’m not easily intimidated because I was a bouncer in a gay bar, but Lou found it really upsetting.”
While the couple have been on the receiving end of threats and bullying, they don’t let the fear of abuse stop them from encouraging their son to step outside of the gender boundaries.
“Star is only in nursery but has already been put under pressure by other children. He came home the other day saying, ‘I can’t play with dolls – they’re for girls’.
“We sat him down and explained that anyone can play with dolls and that it’s good practice for when he grows up and is a daddy. He said, ‘I might not be a daddy – I might be a mammy!
“When we decided to raise Star as gender fluid we talked about things like other children’s attitudes.
“Of course we had doubts – what would other people say, what trouble could it cause, would our son be bullied?
“But then we realised children always find a reason to bully other kids.
“When one boy told him he looks like a girl, Star told them he looked like the comic book hero Aquaman.”
It’s true that it’s not a parenting style everyone agrees with it, but their parenting techniques are actually in line with the advice issued from the Tavistock and Portman NHS Foundation Trust in London, which is the centre specialising in psychological well-being, which even has a dedicated Gender Identity Development Service.
No matter what others may think, as long as the child is happy, that’s all the matters really!
What do you think about these interesting parenting style?
Feel free to let me know in the COMMENTS! I’d love to hear from you!
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