15 Embarrassing Things That All Women Do But Refuse To Admit

15 Embarrassing Things That All Women Do But Refuse To Admit

Yep, we’re all guilty. 

You tweet every passing thought that comes into your head, Instagram every meal you eat and let your distant classmates from a lifetime ago nosey at every aspect of your life on Facebook. But there’s still some things that us women refuse to tell the world.  

Sometimes all you need is an article that you can read in the privacy of your own bed, written by a girl who’s willing to lose all dignity and shame for the good of womankind, to let you know that you’re not alone. You need someone to say those dark secrets that have been eating away at you for so many years out loud, someone to just come out and admit ‘ OK FINE. There’s nothing I find more satisfying in this life than pulling long, stray pieces of my head hair out of my bum crack in the shower’. 

Once we break down the walls of social politeness and ‘lady-like’ etiquette, the truth is, we’re all a bit weird and disgusting. So, prepare to feel liberated as we take you through the Top 15 Embarrassing Things Women Do But Refuse To Admit.  

(we guarantee you’ve done at least 5) …

1) Pulling out trapped pieces of head hair from in-between your buttocks is a common shower ritual.  

Weve kinda covered this above, but the level of satisfaction that this gives us every time were washing our hair is deserving of some elaboration. Between all the annoying traits of having long locks (spending hours detangling, the severe physical pain of taking out velcro rollers etc), this is long hairs sweet silver lining. 

2) Uncontrollable selfie duck face 

It’s getting silly now.

3) Watching yourself cry in the mirror 

And then you cry more because you look so sad. Its one of the more narcissistic, self-destructive things we do- but we do it anyway and secretly find it quite therapeutic. Sometimes you just simply want to know if youre an ugly crier, other times you like to revel in your own melodramatic breakdowns and pretend youre in a soppy rom-com. 

4) Taking Facebook stalking way too far  

Youve been reflecting on your past and suddenly have the urge to look at your ex-boyfriends Facebook to double check that hes still a loser. One thing leads to another, and the next thing you know youre on his cousins-best friends-uncles-sons ex girlfriends holiday photos from Mexico 2005. You click back on your exs profile once more and accidentally click the Hellobutton. The humiliation. You want the ground to swallow you up. You open a new tab and look at one-way tickets to Mexico and google how to fake my own death.. 

5) Plucking rogue body hairs from places where they shouldnt even be growing

“Urgh, how is my new blusher brush malting already?! Oh no wait… that’s just a random, long black hair that my body has lovingly sprouted out of nowhere”. Why is Mother Nature such a little b*tch?!

6) We lie about our periods to get out of things we dont want to do

“My turn to do the food shop? I cant Im on my period. Take the garbage out? I cant Im on my period. Pass you the remote thats right next to me? I cant sorry Im on my period.”

7) Going to great lengths to make sure no one can hear you plop’ 

Theres no worse feeling than being at someones house and feeling that sudden urge to use the bathroom. You decide in a moment of desperation to grab life by the horns and make your way to the bathroom. You flush the chain first for some background noise, gather some tissue and strategically place it at the bottom of the bowl as a sort of landing netto soften the sound of the plop. Utter genius.  

8) Selective toe nail painting 

 

The only shoes which go with your outfit are peep-toes. Typical. You make the quick, practical decision to paint only the toes which are showing and pray that your shoes dont rub you so much that you have to slip them off later and display your weird, mix-matched piggies to the world. The shame. 

9) Eating four times the recommended amount of something when youre coming on your period

Serves 4? I think youll find it serves 1. Thank you very much.

10) Shaving only whats absolutely necessary 

The only thing you have left to wear is your trusty ripped jeans- everything else is gathering dust in your laundry basket. Give your knees a quick shave and youre good to go!

11) Sometimes we like to bask in our own filth for a few days.

“Im embracing my inner hippie and you all need to accept me for who I am.”

12) Knowing Mean Girls and Bridget Jones almost word for word.

Is this is embarrassing or actually quite impressive?  Anyway, the skills and achievementssection of my resume wont fill itself.

13) When we first start dating, we hold in all of our farts and then have a farting spree when you leave.

Every woman does this and every woman knows that said spree is absolute euphoria.

14) We often skip the post-pee hand wash 

Oh please. The only time we do this religiously is when were in a busy public place and we have to wash our hands in the fear that the other women are judging us for not washing them. However, theyre probably also thinking the exact same thing. We should all unite and put a stop to the shaming, because lets be honest- its a pain in the ass, the hand driers give us a headache and urine is a natural disinfectant anyway.

15) Turning into a contortionist whilst trying to salvage your Hollywood Wax

The bikini line we can just about deal with. However, what happens after youve had a full Hollywood wax and hairs start to grow back in places that you cant openly scratch in public without looking like you have worms? No wonder we’re so much more flexible then men. 

Are you guilty of any of these or is there anything else youd like to fess up to? Tell us in the comments and dont forget to share with your family and friends- if youre not too embarrassed that is.  

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